Mentalgamestraining

February 19, 2012

2012-02-19T20:23:00.000-08:00

"Everybody's got a game plan, until they get hit!"

-Mike Tyson, Former Boxing Heavyweight champion

Getting hit by Mike Tyson is sure to throw anyone's game plan into disarray. In the 80s and 90s Mike Tyson was the most dominant boxer on the planet. He was the undisputed heavyweight champion, uniting the WBC, WBA and IBF titles. Nintendo even named a videogame named after him. (I figure getting a video game or a Saturday morning cartoon named after you to be the pinnacle of sports achievement). In my hood in the Bronx a “Tyson blow” was synonymous with getting hit really, really, really hard. Ask Trevor Berbick. The victory over Berbick gave Tyson his first belt. But it started even earlier. Ask Joe Cortez. They fought in the Junior Olympics and Tyson knocked him out in 8 seconds. He was still an amateur! Ask Michael Spinks. He got knocked out in the first 91 seconds of his fight with Tyson. Bam! Ask Larry Holmes. Tyson was the only man to knock Holmes out in 75 professional fights. (We must remember Holmes danced with Ali and didn’t get knocked out)! Ask Carl “The Truth” Williams, another first round knockout. Tyson garnered a total of 44 knockouts in his career with many of them occurring in the first or second rounds. I remember purchasing the pay per view for some of those fights. I didn’t actually appreciate PAYing $40 for about 2 minutes of VIEWing. Looking back, I have to say Tyson did give plenty of “bang” for the buck. Sorry, I couldn't resist that pun.

How does this week’s quote apply to you? Have you ever gotten "hit"? It could be a divorce, the death of the spouse, the loss of a job, a serious illness or a car accident. Anything like those can be devastating like a “Tyson blow” and but you can't let it throw you off of your game plan. Such serious challenges can be even worse for us if we had no game plan to begin with. Can you imagine going into a fight with Mike Tyson with no game plan in mind? Tyson was the most feared boxer of his day so I have to wonder what went through the minds of the opponents he faced in the years 1985 to 1992 when he was at the peak of his professional career. I hope they had a plan. Even with a plan most of them, however, had never been hit by a fighter who punched as hard as Iron Mike Tyson. The shock and trauma that results from that kind of punch can definitely cause us to forget whatever well laid plans we might have made in the days and weeks leading up to such a fight.

Mental coaching stresses goal setting. Part of having a goal like being heavyweight champ means having a plan. Do you have a life plan? What is it that you want to do? Where is it that you want to go? How are you going to make it happen? May be you've got a plan for your business. Maybe you've got a plan for something more low-key like your next vacation but have you planned for life's hard hits? Have you planned for the unforeseen circumstances that can strike without warning? The great thing about fighting with Tyson in the 80s was that if you could weather the storm of the first one or two Tyson blows and make it through to the second round then you might actually have had a chance. Unfortunately, in the ring of real life the hard hits don't necessarily come in the first round. They can come at any time.

I once coached a client who was a marathon runner who was also planning her wedding. Sharon was a very organized person and had very detailed lists of all the things that she needed to do leading up to her wedding day and many of the tasks that needed to be done were being handled by her parents. Her mom and her dad were very supportive and had the finances to give her a very beautiful wedding. What she didn’t foresee was the strain that the wedding would place upon her parents relationship. For reasons that I never learned, her parents “suddenly” separated after 25 years of marriage just weeks before her nuptials. Although the wedding did go forward, the fact that when her father walked her down the aisle, Sharon no longer had the sense of certainty of her parents’ 25 years of successful marriage. As a result, she lacked that sense of confidence and assurance she expected to have as she entered into married life. While it isn't realistic that she could have anticipated something like this happening, it's important to know that the only thing in life that is constant is change. Being able to adapt, flow and adjust is the hallmark of a mentally tough competitor whether in sport, business or the game of life.

Today, make it a point of reviewing your game plan. Make sure that you have one and make sure that the game plan anticipates heavy hits. Make sure that your game plan takes into account the possibility of severe financial setbacks or the loss of key logistical or emotional support. Getting into a motorcycle accident and breaking your leg the day before the Olympic trials could be considered an extreme stroke of bad luck but that's one of the reasons why successful competitors avoid high-risk activities in the weeks leading up to such an important event. Freak accidents aside, bad officiating, lost luggage, power failures and poor weather conditions are things that most seasoned athletes have encountered once or twice. For some competitors, it is the multiple hits and not a single hard hit that take them out of the game. Using mental skills like goal-setting and visualization can increase your mental toughness and solidify your resolve to overcome any and all challenges in the pursuit of your goal. Make your plan thorough and do your best to anticipate and overcome the difficulties that are inevitable when pursuing of anything significant like earning a black belt, starting a business or completing a degree. When the “Tyson blow” comes, as it often does, completely unseen, mentally shake it off, use some positive self-talk and go right back to your plan of action. The best fighters in mixed martial arts are able to stick to their plan even after they get knocked down by a “Superman punch”.

Ajamu Ayinde, C.M. Ht., A.C.H., Certified Sports Hypnotist & Creator

M.E.N.T.A.L. Games ™ sports enhancement system
Sports success begins in the mind. ™
Connect with me on FB: www.facebook.com/ajamu.ayinde
Visit our website: http://advantage-enterprises.yolasite.com
Subscribe to our weekly sports psych blog: http://mentalgamestraining.blogspot.com
Contact Us: 845-240-6470 and on Skype@ Sambamindman ajamuayinde@gmail.com

February 12, 2012

2012-02-12T12:00:00.000-08:00

“You could be the world's best garbage man, the world's best model; it doesn't matter what you do if you're the best.”

-Muhammad Ali, former heavyweight boxing champ

The desire to be the best pushes athletes in every sport. What is required to be the best? Is it how strong you are? How fast you are? Is it the championship titles or Super Bowl rings you have? Muhammad Ali is nicknamed “The Greatest” and has an incredible record of 56 wins with 37 by knockout and only five losses. Boxing experts list Ali as the greatest fighter of any era and the only other fighters who come close to commanding the same level as of respect are Sugar Ray Robinson and Joe Lewis. Ali did what no one had ever done, he won the heavyweight championship on four separate occasions. However, some of Ali's prime years as a fighter were spent idle. He was denied a boxing license due to his status as a conscientious objector during the Vietnam War.

Part of being the best is making tough choices and facing the consequences. The Vietnam War divided our country. So many people were against it and so many young men saw it as their duty to support the government's role in Southeast Asia. It's not so different from today. Many are critical of the war in the Middle East. Ali made a choice not to fight because of his religious convictions. My father fought in Korea and my older brother served in the Viet Nam era. You may or may not agree with Ali’s decision but I hope you can respect that he made a decision based on his principles and he paid the price for it. Refusing the draft in Vietnam hurt Ali as a boxer and financially. However, it probably helped him as a person. Part of growing up is finding your voice, discovering your values and morals and doing everything you can to live your life based on those things.

Hard work is a virtue. Discipline is a virtue. These are the keys to being the best. Yet so many people find it difficult to work hard and be disciplined. At the same time they say they want to be the best. Sporting activity can be very different from work. In the world of work sometimes the effort that we do is not seen to directly benefit us. In sport it’s a completely different story. All your effort and hard work go into making you a better athlete. Your team may not always win but at least you know you've done your part to make a victory much more possible.

When you're given a job by your coach or supervisor do you drag your feet? It's pretty common. Sometimes it's because we don't understand why were asked to do a certain job. Sometimes it's the way we were asked to do it. It can be hard to get beyond that but it's an important step in your growth as a player. Always do the task you are given to the best of your ability. If there are several other people involved in the task, make sure that you're the strongest link in the chain.

“Jive” is a word I used to hear a lot in my home growing up. It was a word that my mom used all the time when she was describing her coworkers. “Jive turkey” was a very popular expression in the ‘70s but it faded out after a few years. The problem is the behavior hasn't gone anywhere. These days we use different words to describe the same behavior. A jive coworker has no interest in being the best they can be. Since I was a kid I have always wanted my finished product to be excellent and not judged as “jive”. My mom had very high standards for herself and I know I inherited that from her.

Why are there so many jive turkeys everywhere? I don't really like to describe people as lazy. I just think some people have different standards of effort and excellence. We see it every day when cleaning a room, completing a job at work or working out in the gym. What is your standard of effort? How do you personally define excellence? Where did you learn your standards?

The only way that it possible to be the best at anything is to have high, exacting standards. We can never guarantee the outcome of our actions but we can't guarantee the effort that we put in. Muhammad Ali came from a strong, stable home and could have made very different career choices. He didn‘t need to fight his way out of poverty. The fact is at a very early age he found out he was very good at boxing. When we demonstrate success at something we enjoy, it instills a desire to get even better. This is especially true when the activity seems fun or easy to us. Ali made it look easy when he won his first Golden Gloves match 1958. He won on the local level and then on a state level and that could've been the end of the story. To be the best boxer in your weight class in your entire state is a tremendous accomplishment.

Ali’s next step in his quest to be the best was to become an Olympic champion and represent his country. It was at the Olympics in 1960 that Ali won the gold. However, being the best amateur boxer in the world didn't exempt him from racial discrimination in his home state of Kentucky. As terrible as racism is everyone has some kind of hurdle to deal with, some kind of challenge that is completely unfair but necessary to overcome. Having an unfair boss or coach can cause some to quit. For those who have the heart of a champion, that unfairness can cause them to work harder than ever in order to master the skills necessary to change the situation for the better.

Whatever your sport is find a model of excellence. Find out how hard they train and know that you must train even harder. Being the best is about more than just physical skills. Who you can look up to as a person? Ali has many accomplishments inside the boxing ring but he has placed a great deal of importance on character development, spirituality and his humanitarian mission since he retired. Your religious path may be different but Muhammad Ali’s commitment to the religion of Islam certainly helped him to find his moral compass and avoid the negative behavior that destroys more fighters than the hardest punches ever could. In order to resist the vices of drugs, alcohol, cigarettes, and gambling you must master your emotions and win the “war within” to be the “greatest” in your sport.

Ajamu Ayinde, C.M. Ht., A.C.H., Certified Sports Hypnotist & Creator

February 3, 2012

2012-02-03T10:54:00.000-08:00

“You have to dream big and go for it. Surround yourself with people who believe in you and ignore those who try to bring you down. Never give up, no matter what-- overcoming obstacles makes you stronger!”

-Shannon MacMillan, US Olympic and women's national soccer champion

February is Black history month. This month I wanted to focus specifically on quotes from black athletes in my blog post. I have a pretty large database of quotes from athletes from all races, sports and genders. I look through my database daily and I post different ones on my Facebook page. At the end of the week I choose one that really speaks to me and develop my weekly blog post around it. I looked at some great quotes in preparing this week. I examined quotes from Tiger Woods, Flo Jo, Magic Johnson, Venus Williams, and Michael Jordan, arguably from some of the greatest Black athletes of the modern era. And they had a lot of great things to say but you know sometimes it's really not about race. It's really about the message not the messenger. I found a quote from a White athlete that many of my readers may not know who really has something to contribute and that's why I chose Shannon Macmillan.

Most non-soccer people probably have never heard of Shannon Macmillan. I know I had not heard of her before I got involved with providing mental coaching services to high school soccer players. She’s an Olympian and a legend in the world of women’s soccer. However, soccer is not the most popular sport in the US. To make matters worse, women athletes tend to get relegated to second-class status in virtually every sport. But one of my reasons for writing this blog is to highlight principles, ideas, and mental strategies from high-level achievers in all sports and the performing arts. Part of my mission as a mental coach is to break down barriers between sports, races and genders. I've listed this as a goal in my company's mission statement. Largely, barriers exist between different groups because of the lack of knowledge. I hope this blog post will educate more people about soccer, women, and champion thinking in order to outgrow some of their prejudice.

Cross training first became popular in the 80’s. Athletes like distance runners who normally relied solely upon exercises that would build their cardiovascular endurance started to adopt weight training. Athletes like football linebackers that would normally dedicate many hours to weight training started getting on exercise bikes and treadmills and upping their cardio. It was a good thing. In the 70’s and 80’s I remember reading articles in Sports Illustrated about football players who took ballet classes or martial arts classes in order to increase their flexibility and agility. What can a ballet dancer learn from a football player? What can a football player will learn from a ballerina? We never know until we sit down and have a conversation.

Today's conversation is not about physical skills that one can learn from a different sport, it's about the mental skills. There is a universal language of champions that cuts across generations, genders, races and sports. Shannon Macmillan’s quote is ideally suited for any athlete or peak performer to study. Shannon is encouraging us to keep several principles in mind in order to be your best. The first is “dreaming big”. The world is filled with people who don't allow themselves to dream at all. If and when they do start to dream, they choose very small, conservative dreams that don't allow them to really stretch or reach their full potential. Other people have no problem with dreaming big but it falls flat because they fail to act on those dreams. I’ll give an example. I have clients come to me when they want to make a breakthrough. I met Joseph about five years ago. He had a good job as a social worker making decent money with health insurance and job security but he was longing to make a bigger contribution and start his own business. That was his dream before we met and like most people he read books, attended seminars and listened to recordings all designed to help him to achieve this dream. The problem was that Joseph was unable to take any action. He had everything he needed to go for it but was unable to take the leap. My coaching helped Joseph to release his brakes by reprogramming his subconscious beliefs about starting his own consulting practice. He is now a successful IT consultant, changing the world one client at a time.

I think what makes sports so exciting to watch and read about and participate in is that it's about action. It's not an intellectual pursuit. However, there is a great deal of mental activity that goes on behind the scenes. It is the dream or mental image of getting a soccer ball in the net, sinking the basket in basketball or crossing the finish line in a race that propels the athlete to take decisive action. Without the big dream there is never any action but without the action the dream remains just a wish. Athletes can dream and achieve on a higher level than they ever thought possible by reading the biographies and exploits of other athletes in their field and outside of their field. For example, a tennis player who learns about the endurance regimen of a marathon runner could significantly improve her performance. A golfer significantly increases his performance output by adding weight training to his golf regimen. Tiger Woods led the way by showing other golfers the importance of strength training.

The second thing Shannon talks about is surrounding yourself with the right kind of people. When you have big dreams and are taking action it can be scary to some of the people that are around you who may not be big dreamers. Your family, friends or coworkers may not be action-oriented. As a result, they may shoot down your dreams and may cause you to hesitate in taking action. The right kind of team produces an environment that is conducive for the growth of all the athletes involved. The right kind of coach dreams big and takes massive action and encourages the team to do the same. In my opinion, the coach helps the athlete to find her dream but it's her responsibility to take action on it. It's always an inside game. As the saying goes, you can lead a horse to water but you can't make them drink. When I was a schoolteacher in New York City, I saw many students with incredible potential. My job was to help them recognize it but unless those students were ready to release that potential nothing changed. Hypnosis takes students who have the potential to do well academically to the top of the honor roll and Dean's list. I'm living proof of this and I've helped many of the students in my care do the same thing by teaching them self-hypnosis.

Birds of a feather flock together. It's hard to soar like an eagle when surrounded by turkeys. These expressions are popular because they have a ring of truth to them. In order to reach high levels in any activity like sports, sales, performing arts, or academics it's important to be around people who believe in you and who are possibility thinkers on the road to high achievement. So many bright young people in inner-city schools never excel academically because the peer group discourages intellectual pursuits. “Don't waste your time studying for a test.” “Don't join the math team.” “Don't try to learn to play chess.” Those things are for nerds, right? When I was in junior high school I was a bit of a nerd. Surprise, surprise! My jokes didn’t go over so well and I didn't have designer jeans and shell-toe Adidas like the cool kids but I could dance and I could fight and that helped me survive.

Nothing is ever accomplished without persistence. That's the third message within Shannon’s quote. Never give up. It's easy to say but hard to live. The secret to persistence is found in the other elements that we've alluded to in the blog post. The dream that we hold in our minds helps us to keep going and be relentless. Having taken action we’re in motion and because we ARE in motion, it’s easier to keep going. An object at rest tends to remain at rest and an object in motion tends to remain in motion. These are scientific principles. When you're dreaming big and taking action on a regular basis, it's easy to keep taking steps in order to reach your destination. The problem occurs when we lose our momentum. Maybe you've stopped going to the gym for a while. Maybe you've got out of the habit of eating salad with each meal or something as simple and healthy as drinking enough water each day. Because you “stopped" it may seem hard to pick up that habit again. Let's go back to the third element in Shannon's quote, “Surround yourself…” Surround yourself with people who are like-minded. If all your friends go to the bar and drink after work how likely is it that you'll do the same thing? Conversely, if all your friends go immediately to the gym after work how likely is it that you'll do the same thing? Having the right kind of people in your life who are health conscious, fitness conscious or motivated toward high levels of performance in some sport or activity, tends to assist you to be a little bit more disciplined in your pursuit of excellence.

The last element in Shannon’s quote has to do with the way that champions see obstacles. They see them as necessary for growth. Let's substitute the word “problem” for “obstacle”. How do you feel about problems? The attitude that we have toward these problems or obstacles makes all the difference in whether or not we surmount them. What are the questions that come to you when the obstacle shows up in your life? “Why does this always happen to me?” “Why me?” “What have I done to deserve this?” We need to change these questions because they don't lead to good results. Ask a better question and you're likely to get a better result. For example, if you asked yourself what can you learn from this or how can you solve this challenge and enjoy the process you're more likely to not give up. Obstacles and challenges are fundamental to sport. If there were no “hurdles” it would be far too easy. Challenges are built into games like golf in order to allow humans to develop skill as well as the mental muscles of persistence, concentration and calm under pressure. Shannon Macmillan has offered us a great quote this week that can be taken and applied by athletes of every single sport without respect to age, nationality, gender or even race. It's such a pleasure to be involved in the field of applied sports psychology and be able to spread the championship wisdom of the practitioners of various sports especially the lesser known ones.

Ajamu Ayinde, C.M. Ht., A.C.H., Certified Sports Hypnotist & Creator
M.E.N.T.A.L. Games ™ sports enhancement system
Sports success begins in the mind. ™
Connect with me on FB: www.facebook.com/ajamu.ayinde
Visit our website: http://advantage-enterprises.yolasite.com
Subscribe to our weekly sports psych blog: http://mentalgamestraining.blogspot.com
Contact Us: 845-240-6470 and on Skype@ Sambamindman ajamuayinde@gmail.com

January 27, 2012

2012-01-27T11:58:00.000-08:00

“Twenty seconds before a race, there’s absolute focus. The key thing is to achieve relaxation, but at the same time you've got to have this absolute total control. You got to find the balance between being totally ready to go and being really at peace with yourself, as well.
-Cathy Freeman, Australian track and field champion, Gold Medalist, 400 meters in Sydney 2000

When you're moments away from running a big race relaxation is essential. For many athletes the time leading up to the race is anything but calm. The lack of calm leads to scattered thinking. However, without the proper focus the mind is open to stray thoughts. These thoughts are often a potent combination of doubt, negativity, and uncertainty, Sounds like a good recipe for losing. The problem is the ability to relax in a clutch moment is not something that many athletes can do. The ability to consciously relax is something that high-level athletes learn early and perform often. Look at MMA fighting legend Fedor Emelianenko before a fight and you’ll see what I mean about calm before an important contest.

Wait a minute! Didn’t the quote say you have to be ready? You know, “totally ready to go”? Before a big game we all want to be hot, hyped up and ready to rumble, right?! OK, maybe I’m overstating the case a little. I’m seeing a bit of paradox here. Let me explain. My M.E.N.T.A.L. Games approach to coaching athletes employs some ideas I learned in the martial arts. The Japanese martial arts are based in the practice of Zen Buddhism. One of the central tenets of Zen is to be present or in the moment. You can gain the ability to focus and be in the present moment by practicing relaxation. A great way to relax is to focus on what's in front of you. When the mind is focused in this way, the body relaxes easily. With the absence of the muscular tension the body is free to do what it's meant to do. I know, it’s a bit confusing.

Zen is a philosophy that often involves contradictions. Being relaxed and calm on the outside and yet inwardly ready to strike with a razor sharp sword was what the ancient samurai trained to be able to do. Most of today’s athletes may not get their lessons from ancient spiritual practices but modern sciences like sports psychology have studied the best of the best across all sports and disciplines and found that the way of the samurai works. The optimal arousal level for an athlete is somewhere between being completely hyped (active) and absolutely calm (passive). If there is too much arousal it leads to muscular tension and a much slower race. Not enough energy leads to a lack of speed and a snail-like pace. Only by have the right amount of energy and relaxation at the same time can an athlete run their best race. Working with college level runner named Adrian a few years ago I am reminded of how he would produce a very high level of adrenalin to explode out of the starting blocks in a race. He was a very fast starter but he tended to burn himself out and lose energy before the end of the race. It was like running a marathon like it was one mile instead of twenty-six! Explosive power is great but there is a point of diminishing returns. Too much energy or adrenalin leads to poor performances period. The adrenalin dump can result in getting gassed early, false starts and choking. Adrian learned how to find the right balance of energy and relaxation using the applied sports psychology tools that I describe later in this blog.

Think of the body as a machine for a minute and the excitement in your body as steam building up. Machines can overheat and so safety valves and other self-regulating devices are built in when designing them. In between matches “corner men” are able to get a fighter to attend to their breathing and lower their level of arousal in between rounds and that lets some of the “steam” escape. Pressure and stress are all in the mind. If an athletes thinks she is behind on points and in danger of losing the match she can use visual, auditory, kinesthetic or cognitive strategies to restore that optimal level of arousal. The fighter can look into the eyes of the trainer (visual), listen to the soothing cadence of the coaches words, practice deep breathing (kinesthetic or close her eyes and focus on a peaceful imagined scene (cognitive). All of these approaches work to help an athlete release the right amount of “steam” and return to the game with the right amount of athletic arousal.

Control is essential to success in your sport and life. Realize that it’s not an issue of all or nothing. It’s both. Embrace the opposites. The body is like a thermostat and in the course of a match your energy goes up and down. Know that you have tools to restore yourself to the “right” temperature for you to play your best game. You probably don’t need techniques to get hyped up. We’re all familiar finding that competitive fire. The practice of meditation or self-hypnosis can acquaint you with the peace that will balance the fire. Keep balance in mind. I want to leave you with the following metaphor. In the old days of wooden sailing ships sailors relied on the winds to carry them to their destinations. Too much wind meant that they would be dashed upon the rocks and all would be lost. Not enough wind and the ship would not able to leave port and the cargo would spoil. The right (optimal) amount of wind brought them safely home.

Ajamu Ayinde, C.M. Ht., A.C.H., Certified Sports Hypnotist & Creator

January 22, 2012

2012-01-22T16:19:00.000-08:00

“The important thing in the Olympic Games is not to win but to take part; the important thing in life is not the triumph but the struggle. The essential thing is not to have conquered but to have fought well.” -Baron Pierre de Coubertin, Founder of the modern Olympic Games

These concepts underlie the work that I do as a Mental Coach. These wise words may be lost to many modern athletes. That is why I think it's so important to return to our roots. If you’re a competitive athlete these words are good to remember. You will not always win. Losing sometimes is inevitable. Are you one of those people who stop yourself from participating because of some fear? Is it a fear of losing or a fear of winning? So many people don't allow themselves to go for it in the game of life because they fear they might not win. There are other fears too. The fear of injury and of being embarrassed or humiliated knocks so many out before they ever meet their actual competition. Fear of defeat keeps so many from continuing in the sport their chosen sport.

Some never even take the first step and get started in a sport. I started taking dance classes when I was a freshman in high school. I really enjoyed learning ballet, modern and jazz dance. It was a brand new world that opened to me. Dance changed my life forever. But it may have never happened. I had an opportunity to start classes in seventh grade but I was afraid. My fear was of being judged by my peers. I didn’t want be the only boy in the class. For two years that fear stopped from signing up. It’s a common story for many boys my age. I had the interest, talent and opportunity but I had a huge mental block. No one ever said I couldn’t do it or that I shouldn’t do it. I looked around and saw what others were doing and decided I would go with the crowd. They were taking instrumental music and I followed the herd. I’m not going to be so hard on myself. I was twelve years old, after all. But how many of us act the same way at 22, 32 or 52? More than I few, I would wager.

Maybe you're not an athlete and are unsure if this lesson could apply to you. Let me ask you a few questions. Are you fully participating in the game of life? Do you believe that there is a place for you to your mark or do you feel unworthy? Do you believe that there is something that you lack that disqualifies you from pursuing your dreams? One of my favorite things about watching the Olympics is when I see players from a tiny country sharing the stage with athletes from much bigger countries. The same thing happens in the world of professional soccer. During the World Cup it's so exciting to see relatively small countries like Ghana do well. I remember in 2010 when they became the third African country to ever reach the quarterfinals. Sometimes it’s not about size, the country just may be relatively new to international competition and be facing another that has won many world championships. Ghana didn’t let their relative size or youth stop them. The International Olympic Committee actually encourages smaller countries to find their best players and bring their "A" game.

The Olympic Games were founded on this principle of participation. Equal participation can extend beyond sports to music, dance, comedy, manufacturing, literature, business or almost anything. I live in a very big country with a sizable population but even here people hold themselves back and do not fully participate in their chosen activity or interest. Why? They lack the encouragement to go forward. Individuals like international sports teams must be nurtured and supported in order for them to increase in skill and confidence. You first job is to figure out the area that you are most passionate to participate in. Don’t let anything stand in your way. No matter where you in the world, you can find a coach to encourage you and to raise your level of skill. Skill is not the most important quality, however. Courage, commitment and concentration are things that go hand in hand with athletic skill. Many of my athletic clients come to me with an abundance of skill. They are healthy, fit and experienced in their position. Mental Coaching provides them with the edge they need to really believe in themselves and become willing try out for a new team, enter a tournament or go up to a new weight class. Knowing that you belong on the team and that you deserve a place is an important realization for every athlete.

Sports are full of upsets, players or teams that took the gold when no one else believed they had a chance. The U.S. Men’s hockey team in 1980 is a great example of that. How you deal with uncertainty can change. If you verbally beat yourself up, second-guess your skill or forget past successes… that all changes today. Applied sports psychology helps you to make friends with your mind and eliminate self-sabotage. Self-handicapping is the one thing that no amount of weights, cardio or nutrition can cure. Do you have the will to win? Does your belief in yourself let you keep fighting when you can barely lift your arms? Whatever sport you may believe that your personal chances of winning a medal may be extremely remote. But that was yesterday. The past is gone. Today you start believing. Today you decide to participate fully. Don’t let past limiting beliefs stop you from suiting up, getting on the field and giving it your absolute best. Can you feel good about your preparation and play? Was your last “game” the best game you were capable of playing? Have you truly “fought well”? If so, feel great about yourself. Feel like an Olympian.

January 13, 2012

2012-01-13T11:10:00.000-08:00

“Please don’t wish to have no obstacles, wish for the power to go through them or the ingenuity to go around them. “
-Ajamu James Ayinde, Master Mental Coach and Certified Sports Hypnotist

It's much easier to see how difficult circumstances are helpful in building character… in other people. When it comes to our own lives, we would all rather have smooth sailing. Few people seek out difficult circumstances by which to test themselves. But isn't that what athletes do? It's fun to watch or read about but doing it ourselves is another story. Don’t beat yourself up too much. It's a pretty natural tendency in most people but it doesn’t help you grow. Going back to the metaphor “smooth sailing’, the sailor who CHOOSES to sail in rough waters or navigate by the position of the stars grows in skill and confidence. We never know when circumstances will make this a necessity. It's important to remember that. No one chooses a life of hardship, filled with trials and tribulations and yet somehow it still can happen. The tough times come without our bidding. How well you are prepared for these unforeseen circumstances has a lot to do with the number of times you've chosen to overcome hurdles and the fortitude you have built as a result. I watched a match between John Fitch and Paulo Thiago at UFC 100 recently and I saw a great example someone working his way out of a tight spot literally, escaping a guillotine choke. The commentators mentioned over and over the sacrifices Fitch made to get to his level of fitness. For those who don’t know Fitch, he was a walk-on at Perdue and went on to be Captain of that university’s highly respected wrestling team.

An easy life completely free of difficulties seems like a great thing. However, a wise man once said, “Accustom your children to hardship”. Parents who find ways to safely expose children to challenges are helping them to grow into capable adults. This approach doesn’t just apply to athletes or children. The difficulties we face as a nation or culture help us all to advance as people. Difficulties like the Great Depression and 911 have proven that. In karate and other sports; coaches place athletes in situations where they must move beyond their current limitations, be they physical or emotional. It is only by placing obstacles in the path of athlete that he or she learns to run faster or leap higher. Without those obstacles the athlete would not advance physically or mature emotionally.

I remember what it was like in high school when I had a substitute teacher for one of my classes. While it wasn't guaranteed, most of us kids in the room could be pretty sure that it was going to be an easy day. How could she push us when she didn't even know us? Without some pushing can you bring out your best? But when your teacher knows you and is a good teacher, she will press you and will test you because she knows it's in your best interest. My US history teacher in high school, Mr. Hitz always helped bring out my best. There was no way to slack off in his class and when I moved on to another teacher, I missed his tough standards when I was no longer required to bring my best effort to get a good grade. A race that is won with little or no effort isn't really appreciated or remembered, don’t you agree? Don't get me wrong, I look forward to a vacation from hard work as much as the next guy but too many of those days leads to a weakening of your skills.

What's going on in your life right now? Are you in an environment that is challenging? Do you see gains on a weekly or monthly basis from the efforts that you're exerting? If you're not seeing the results that you would like, you have only two choices: work harder or work smarter. A Mental Coach can be helpful in these cases to help you to put forth more effort or direct your efforts in a new way so that you can start to see progress. In my role as a Master Mental Coach, I motivate my clients to renew their efforts. I'm also able to help them diagnose where they might change their focus. Sometimes the athlete may be hitting the wall and more effort in the same direction will only bring frustration. Pausing, taking a step back or changing direction can be what's truly needed to make a breakthrough but such a change in approach doesn't get adopted unless one adopts an outsider’s perspective.

Remember the expression about pressure and how it creates diamonds. Embrace the pressure and make it work for you. Diamonds are brilliant, tough and rare and so are you.

-Ajamu James Ayinde, M.A., A.C.H.

Master Mental Coach

Creator of the M.E.N.T.A.L. Games ™ system of sports enhancement

“Sports success begins in the mind.” ™

845 240-6470

1/7/2012

2012-01-07T06:50:00.000-08:00

“I like to be against the odds. I’m not afraid to be lonely at the top. With me, it’s just the satisfaction of the game. Just performance.”

-Barry Bonds, MLB player, San Francisco Giants

Perhaps you are a student of the game. It doesn't really matter which game, it can be baseball, basketball or boxing … everyone loves an underdog. It’s a deep paradox in sports but when two teams or two individuals seem to be mismatched we almost always end up rooting for the underdog. It's kind of weird. On the one hand, people expect them to lose because they’re outclassed but there's something in our spirit that holds out hope that even though that other team has less experience, an injured quarterback or a shorter forward somehow they have a chance to win.

Different athletes respond to being the underdog in different ways. The most successful athletes thrive under that pressure. Being the underdog brings out the best in them. It’s very likely that in their teen years if someone said they couldn’t do something like make the varsity team they ignored that person whether it was a teammate, coach or parent. Almost immediately they pulled out all the stops to prove that other person wrong. Later in life, they continue to prove their critics wrong in the world of professional sport. It's a character trait that successful athletes have but it's more than just being stubborn or even being optimistic. It has to do with self-esteem. It’s all about how you view yourself. A person with high self-esteem will feel capable of doing something he or she wants to do even if that's something that he or she has never done. People with extremely high self-esteem will feel that it's possible to do something that no one's ever done before. A person with low self-esteem will doubt their ability to do something even if others before them have done it and sometimes even if they've personally done in the past.

The good news is that self-esteem can be improved. There are many tools available to the Mental Coach that can allow a player to think and act like a Barry Bonds. Some techniques like direct suggestion under hypnosis can cause an immediate turnaround in the confidence of an athlete or team. Earlier this week a mentor of mine shared a story about an underdog college football team in California. They were set to play one of their division rivals on Sunday and going into this game they had an abysmal record of zero and 10 but after working with the hypnotist they went out and faced the other team and blanked them by over 40 points. They just wouldn't stop. In their minds they were unstoppable. Their ability to play football had not changed dramatically in the week leading up to that game, only their attitude and belief.

Are you one of those people who are negatively affected when the odds are against you? When others have low expectations of you does it bring you down? If so, use self-hypnosis to get fired up. See yourself as the underdog and own that. Realize that the world of sports is filled with stories of underdogs who believed in themselves when others did not. Maybe the coach didn't believe in them. Maybe the fans didn’t believe in them anymore but the team continued to believe in themselves even when it wasn't logical. Believing in yourself doesn’t have to make sense but it’s a necessity. When things go against you, it obscures your ability to see who you really are and what you really have. Don’t get stuck on statistics: your win-loss record, your age, your height, your weight or your bank account. The numbers don’t matter. Your creative ideas, your discipline, your character, and your fighting spirit cannot be put on paper but they count for more than you can ever imagine.

In this New Year you may be approaching situations in your sport or in your business like an underdog but that's okay. Accept it. It is what it is. Choose to be a pit bull rather than a toy poodle. Don't take anyone's so-called good advice about what you can and can't do. As the saying goes: it's not the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog. Rrrroooowwwwf!!

-Ajamu James Ayinde, M.A., A.C.H.
Master Mental Coach
Creator of the M.E.N.T.A.L. Games ™ system of sports enhancement
“Sports success begins in the mind.” ™
845 240-6470

12/31/11

2011-12-31T18:17:00.000-08:00

“When you love what you are doing and know where you are going, fears become minor little setbacks, trying times that turn into learning experiences.”

-Theresa Jordan, PhD and Peter DeMichele, Overcoming the Fear of Riding

Knowing where you're going is the master key to success. Having clearer goals allows you to enjoy the journey you're on so much more than when you're following someone else's game plan or no game plan at all. Spend the time to choose a worthy goal. Commit to being the best at whatever level it is appropriate for you. When you know that your actions and activities are purposeful you are likely to find more joy in them. Push-ups done on your knuckles may be difficult at the time but when you know that will make your punches that much stronger it is worth it. Training hard makes you that much more resistant to pain when sparring. In the New Year you can attack your exercise regimen with greater enthusiasm.

December 23, 2011

2011-12-23T16:09:00.000-08:00

“I've learned that failure precedes success, and the right decisions are extension of the wrong ones.”

-Alex Spano, NFL Owner, San Diego Chargers

Failure sucks. It hurts and it feels so final. It’s natural to want to avoid mistakes. No one consciously seeks to make wrong decisions. Becoming fearful about making mistakes can become a big problem for an athlete. That fear can lead him or her to not making any decisions. How may times have you seen someone hesitating about making the choice and paying a heavy price? One of the best examples I can think of is a quarterback fading back to pass and hesitating and then getting sacked. Knowing that a decision needs to be made doesn't make the choices any fewer or easier to make but a choice must be made. You may disagree. However, not making a choice is also a choice. It's called paralysis by analysis. I know I've dealt with this particular problem over the years. Chances are you have too. We have to remember that are human and as humans we’re bound to make mistakes. Some are large and some are small. It's inevitable. Accept it. But just as small successes often lead to larger successes, small failures and even the not so small ones can also lead to victory.

Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) is a personal change technology that I use a lot with athletes. One of the things that it teaches its practitioners is that failure can be looked at simply as feedback. Coming in fourth in an Olympic event is feedback. Getting knocked out is feedback. Getting beaten in straight sets is feedback. No setback in sports or in life ever need be final. There's something that can be learned, there's feedback that can be analyzed. Once that information is studied, a new approach or new set of tactics can be devised and that can lead to a big victory. I tell my clients that one of the best things that you can do is to learn that there are no bad decisions. After the fact we have hindsight and it becomes so obvious that we’ve made a mistake. But you have to remember that everyone, including you and me, is making the best decisions we can with the information we have at the time. As we grow in maturity and gain experience, the quality of our choices improves. Second-guessing ourselves really doesn't help. Gen. Colin Powell was quoted as saying that in business and battle more money is wasted and more lives are lost from making no decision rather than making the wrong decision. Sometimes it'll feel like a numbers game when you understand that the more mistakes you make the more right decisions you can potentially make.

We are all going to define failure differently. Maybe for you it's coming in second place, being forced to tap out in the match, or being cut from the team. For others it might be failing a course, divorce or getting fired from a job. Although it feels like it, none of these things are the end of the world. Your so-called failure is never final. You will make other better, informed decisions in the future. Maybe you’ll decide to hire a strength and conditioning coach, get a consultation from nutritionist, watch more game footage or start practicing self-hypnosis. There's always a way out or a way back. The most successful people, whether in sports or in business have made some very poor choices. Who was the genius that dreamt up New Coke? How many millions that the Coca Cola company lose because of that decision? The key to quick recovery involves two steps: 1) stop looking at those situations as failures and 2) quickly make a new and better choice. Reactions such as embarrassment, anger and frustration are normal but the champions are able to turn those into more productive emotions and remember the decisions they made the helped put them in the winners circle.

December 17, 2011

2011-12-16T21:25:00.000-08:00

Leadership is a matter of having people look at you and gain confidence, seeing how you react. If you're in control, they're in control.
-Tom Landry, NFL Coach, Dallas Cowboys

Have you ever had a really good teacher? Someone that you really looked up to? I had a great teacher in first grade. Her name was Ms. Green. She was so kind, patient and loving. She never seemed to bring any negative feelings from outside. Our classroom was a haven of positive energy. I realize I draw on examples I learned in her room in my role as a father, husband and back when I was a high school history teacher. Even now I can hear Ms. Green’s words guiding me in my hypnotherapy practice. Believe me, I’ve had my share of teachers who didn’t always react to well to difficult situations or difficult students (like me) but that’s another blog post.

There was a situation today at the high school across the street from my home. When I was out for my walk I saw the school was surrounded by police cars and there was a white news van on scene. I figured this couldn’t be good. My first assumption was that some kind of gang violence had erupted. It’s not that big a stretch of the imagination. I’ve seen my share of violence in school. The first public school I taught at in Brooklyn back in the early 90’s had metal detectors and police officers patrolling the halls. The year before I arrived several students and even a teacher had been shot. After asking a few students who were milling around outside, I got the scoop on today’s shenanigans. There had been a scuffle but it was between two teachers! Apparently, one had stabbed the other several times with a screwdriver. The attacking teacher had been taken away in a police car and the second teacher had left in an ambulance. It’s hard to know what could push one professional educator to such a response. No statement had been released so all I could do was ponder what could cause a veteran English teacher to attack a peer. All I had were questions. How do I feel about this as a parent? What if my child was present? How would I help them handle this? What could I possible say to her? How would I have reacted to something like this when I was in high school?

There are always issues when people are involved. We don’t live in a perfect world. Maybe there was bad blood between the two teachers. Maybe there were problems at home and she brought them to school. It’s all speculation. I'm not here to judge. What I will say is that teachers are leaders and although teachers are human beings students in their care will always look to them to figure out how they're supposed to handle things.

It's not always possible to have control of the situation but as young people mature they're taught to have a certain measure of control over their words and actions. When we resort to violence in response to a conflict that we have with a colleague, neighbor or family member it symbolizes our lack of control. When a leader is promoted to that position is with an understanding that he or she will be able to demonstrate a level of control over their words and actions and thereby inspire the same within the people that they are leading. Leadership is no great mystery. It's hard work and often the rewards are few, kind of like being a teacher. Few people have what it takes to be a true leader because few people have self-control. We don't see coaches throwing tantrums on the sidelines at basketball games the way we used to in the past. They're growing up and exhibiting greater self-control. True leaders model composure under stress and show their team how to find that same strength within themselves. Your calm, courage, and composure are infectious. In the same way, your agitation, fear and “frazzledness” are catching.

Leadership is not about having the title of “boss”. This post is meant to remind you that you have the same potential to be a great leader like Tom Landry. Whether or not you are a coach, teacher, parent or supervisor. Especially if you don't hold any of those titles you can remind the people around you that they possess more inner control than they might suspect. The confident manner you exhibit today is likely a result of difficult experiences when you were less than confident. But you made it to today and you've accepted the mantle of leadership (even if you don't have the title). Hopefully, if you’re a parent you'll never hear from your child that one of his teachers attacked someone in the hall with a knife. Regardless of what you may go through, self-hypnosis allows you to mentally practice behaving in a calm, composed manner in difficult situations. Use it before a crisis occurs in your gym or dojo.

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December 7, 2011

2011-12-07T15:04:00.000-08:00

“The great athletes don't have to think about it. They just go out and do it. The ones that don't have as much ability have to convince themselves that they can play.”

-Jimmy Cefalo, NFL wide receiver, Miami Dolphins

In the martial arts this ability to perform without conscious thought is known as “mushin” or no mind. Athletes have rituals and unique moves that they do to get themselves psyched up for a game. Some are more elaborate and obvious than others. When it’s “go time” and there is no time for the longer version, champions can put themselves into a proper mental state by just repeating a key word like “flame” or“Spartans”. Would you agree that when we play without physically warming up, injuries are a frequent result? If so you will surely agree that when we don’t mentally prep before a game it can lead to less than stellar results. I love this Cefalo quote because it taps into a widely held belief about sports champions. But I would like to challenge that belief. Is it true that the great ones just roll out of bed and onto the gridiron? Are there champions who don’t really have to psych themselves before they head into the Octagon? The myth is that the champions are always ready to go. I don’t believe this. If it is true for a select few, how do they achieve this? I mean, really? How can you guarantee you’ll always be in a prime mental state knowing you can win before

every physical contest? I don’t think that’s possible. If you are the exception to this rule let me ask a follow up question. Were you always able to bring that level of confidence and composure? You probably didn’t have it the first day you picked up a football or put on a uniform.

My point is the ability to let go of all thinking and perform at a high level is a mental skill rather than an inborn attribute. Generations of great football players like Namath, Theismann and Manning have all exhibited it but they learned how to do it and then practiced it. Whoever you admire in sports it is unlikely they had their current level of confidence when they began their professional career or when they competed at the high school or college level. The ability to just go out there and do it is something that is developed over time. This is the one of the reasons to engage in mental skills training. Don’t be intimidated because you don’t have the unstoppable mental state of your football hero. Make it a priority to develop in this area. If every athlete spent one half the time they spend on cardio, weights and other sports drills on some form of mental training they would see a radical improvement in performance. No athlete is born with total athletic confidence and composure. They are developed from a combination of physical training and mental training. Through rigorous physical training skills like passing, rushing and kicking field goals become second nature. With consistent mental training, attitudes like confidence can also become second nature.

Quotes like the one we examined this week perpetuate the myth of the “sports superman”. If we look beneath the surface we will learn that these great players are not superhuman. All the greats mentally prepare themselves before important matches and just because we do not see that preparation does not mean that it does not take place.

November 28, 2011

2011-11-28T12:33:00.000-08:00

“If you can react the same way to winning and losing, that's a big accomplishment. The quality is important because it stays with you the rest of your life …”

-Chris Evert, Hall of Fame tennis player

Playing a sport can be like riding a roller coaster, sometimes you're up and sometimes you're down. And the highs can be very high and lows can be extremely low. Every player knows the thrill of victory and the agony of defeat. The rush that comes with winning is so powerful it’s almost addictive. Many athletes submit themselves the difficulties of rigorous training and competition in order to feel that feeling. That winning feeling is so remarkable and special. We chase it day in and day out. On the flip side, the feelings of failure when we suffer a loss can be devastating. The depths to which an athlete can sink when he has lost an important match is like the deepest, darkest sub-basement you can imagine. It goes down so far the elevator can’t even take you there. If you’ve been in the game for a while, you’ve probably been there. The depression, the loneliness, the shame and guilt… This is where an athlete begins to question not only his performance on a given day but his role on the team, within the sport and even his value as a person.

In sports like tennis or boxing you can lose one round or set then turn around and win the next one and win the whole match. If you lose the first set and your reaction is very strong it cause you to lose the whole shebang. When your emotions are running high it can be difficult to perform as needed in the second set. There’s plenty of time to reflect “when the deal is done.” But just like in poker it’s not advisable to start counting your money too soon, in the combat sports like wrestling or boxing, you don’t want to get carried away prematurely with celebrations or tears.

Professionalism in sports is not limited to people who get paid for playing. Professionalism is an attitude. It stands for many things like objectivity and maturity. A professional has a certain way of looking at the game and stays composed. Things like bad calls, adverse weather conditions and even defeat never ruffle them. On the positive side, money, fame, or world records don’t cause them to lose their center. Keep a positive attitude. Don't change your attitude no matter how many wins or losses you have stacked up. Strive for balance. No matter how gifted an athlete you are the number of years you will not be actively competing in your sport will far outnumber the years that you did compete. For that reason it's important to learn this lesson and not allow yourself to be pulled into an emotional roller coaster ride because of wins or losses.

November 20, 2011

2011-11-20T20:39:00.000-08:00

“The difference between successful and unsuccessful athletes stems largely from the differences in their use of verbalization, imagination and concentration.”

-Jay Mikes, author Basketball Fundamentals

When we look at the most successful athletes in the sport of MMA: Wanderlei Silva, Georges Saint-Pierre, and Randy Couture. These men are masters of the mental game. We all have the same 24-hours a day to work with. Every coach has access to the latest information on nutrition, flexibility and functional strength training to take a fighter’s game to a high level. What most coaches don't teach is the positive use of verbalization. It’s an overlooked piece of the MMA puzzle. Most fighters’ self-talk is negative. Most of our conversation is about what we can’t do rather than what we can do. We talk about our mistakes and failures rather than our successes. The same is true for positive visualization. If we do visualize often it's a worst-case scenario. Don’t get me started on concentration. The attention span of athletes seems to get shorter with each generation.

Commitment to a regimen of mental skills training is essential in the traditional martial arts. Meditation was once a part of every martial arts class. Meditation was time that fighters spent focusing on positive imagination, positive verbalization and the development of concentration. Meditation on the surface appears to be old-fashioned and outdated, however, the ancient art of meditation bears very close similarities to the modern science of sport psychology. The mental edge that Olympic level athletes get from working with a sports psychologist are the same benefits that you derive from meditation. When you relax and gain a more focused state of mind, you achieve more. Meditation can pay untold dividends on and off the mat. You will find you have a stronger ability to see yourself winning-imagination. You'll find that your words are more positive-verbalization. You’ll find that an increased ability to concentrate will serve you well in the critical moments of a match. These positive words and images lead to a positive self-fulfilling prophecy.